1. What subject changes the room when it comes up? 

Don't name it yet. Describe what happens. Who redirects, who leaves, who suddenly becomes very interested in the dishes.

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2. Who is the silence protecting? 

Families go quiet to shield someone from shame or judgment. Sometimes what gets protected is a version of the family that feels safer than the truth.

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3. What have you had to work out alone because of it? 

What questions did you learn not to ask? What did you fill the gap with, and how accurate do you think that guess was?

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4. Write the question you have never been allowed to ask. Exactly as you would ask it. 

Address it to a specific person. Then notice what happens in you after seeing it written down.