A first look at the parts of yourself you would rather not examine.
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What You're Really Arguing About
Find the real conflict underneath the fight you keep having.
1. Describe the argument you have already had six times. What is the surface issue? What sentences do you both reliably land on?
2. What are you trying to get them to understand about you? Underneath the complaint is usually a claim about how you feel in this relationship. Write that claim, in one sentence.
3. Which feeling is the anger saving you from? Anger is often the cheaper option. Hurt, fear, embarrassment, and disappointment all cost more to admit out loud.
4. Write the request. One sentence, with no complaint hidden inside it. "I need you to stop being selfish" is a complaint wearing a request's clothes. Ask for one specific thing you actually want.
Reflection App
Your guided journal for wellness and growth.
Reflection.app is a delightfully-minimal private journaling app with powerful guides to help you flourish. With inspiring prompts, advanced privacy settings, and custom templates, the platform is a favorite among first-time and long-time journalers alike. Founders (and brothers) Dave and Mike Radparvar, also behind Holstee and the famed Holstee Manifesto, have brought their passion for meaningful products and beautiful design to the digital space with Reflection.app
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